Explosion!

One plane exploded in Japan... my perfectly planned holiday plans is literally been blown away.


I have wonderful friends, I hope it's because I've treat them well, they have never ask for my allegience....

I have a wonderful boyfriend, who also respect me enough to.. never ask for my allegience..

But never have i thought.. that the one place where I would've ever imagined ask where my loyalty lies...ask me the exact question....

"you want to go europe, can't you see how much sacrifices we are making to make that plan come true, then you want to go road trip with your friends too, it's time you choose what is more important! your friends or your family! "

guilt... i feel really guilty.... YES i want it all!!! I want a nice last family trip!!! who knows what will happen when emily gets married.!! and YES I want to spend time with my friends... who knows when will be the next time we'll be together. YEs i AM greedy! i want to savour the last moments while it lasts. But sometimes.. life isn't really about what I want, the world does not revolve around me.

"I'll pay for the extra cost ok, let me go back later"
"what if the plane blows up again"
"what kind of stupid airline would let planes blow up within such a short time"
"if it happens once, it's bound to happen again, what is more important than your life or your friends?"

Sometimes... even when we are willing to risk our life for something...it's too precious that ppl will not let me take the risk

even it it is.. the only thing.. that truely belongs to me!