Ok... the lady gave me a call today, and basically she thought i was an international student, and prob have problems paying for the damage ( i did tell her i can't afford the excess fee for my insurance.. come on~~ $1000!!!) so she wants to talk to me face to face tonight, at her house, and if it's 'reasonable' she'll cover the fee for me using her insurance.... How nice of her... really... dotn' know if that's her guilty conscience speaking or she is just being plain nice. Eeek dont' know what to say tonight. Oh i dotn' knwo how to say this... but it's going to be hard, because i dotn' want to pretend that i am a student with no money etc just to win her 'sympathy', the fact is, she shodul be liable for the damage. ARGH~~ i am confused... i think she called out of guilt tho... coz just before we hang up.. i think my voice sounded really shaky... (yea.. i was crying, so what) Oh, i don't know... if she does do it out of sympathy, it's relaly not the way i want to go with this.... but it's better than nothing right? *shrug*. I want emily to go with me, she's more 'strong' in situations like this, but she's busy, so i have to go in alone... wish me luck... still thinking what i should say.

btw, i have such luck in info commons, everytime i come, i wait for like... 1min max before geting a place, feel sorry for all the other ppl waiting =P too BAD!!

Oh yea.. how was the Moon festival last night everyone? i think especailly at there, all purpose of the festival is lost... i mean, sure we ate moon cakes, and we looked at the moon for like... 10 secs (it was cloudy last night) but it just isn't the same anymore. When we were back in tw, my aunty and uncle woudl come to our house (we used to live with our grandparents and my other uncle and aunty and their family) and the adults woudl talk all night long, and we kids would play. TIme have change... now we just spent most of the night in our rooms... doing STUPID PHYSIC!! whcih btw, i got 1 mistake... coz instead of 0.879 i typed 0.897 -_________- *sad* oh well.

So much work to do tonight, i have to go to that lady's house, and doing prelab, and doing physic lab report ><>

Oooo last night.. i dreamt that i was getting my hair straightened, and i was walkign around with all the chemical stuff on my hair.. hehehehe was so sad to find my hair still curly when i wont' up... oh well~~ 1 months and a half to go.... besides... i need my fringe to GROW!!!! omg~~ i have like... 10+ hair clips on me right now just to keep all those fringes in place @____@ Morale of the day, never EVER EVER go to the hairdressor your mum introduce you to. ><

Btw... for study tour ppl, mindy's writing a poem about bruce, she's done about 2/3rd already. check out her site in 1 week time and see her final piece of work =P (this is going to be interesting)

Jjjjjjjust finished physic oasis practice... took me AGES coz i dotn' listen in class, i wag, and the questions are hard.... but it's done, so i better get good marks tomorrow or else. lol

Yesterday had a little car crash.. at the carpark!!! ok... i was backing out, and as i was turning, the car behind me started backing, and well... *bang* everyone is fine, except i could hear the 'pains' of my car when it occured. OK~~ i need ppl's support on this... i backed out first, i checked my back mirror and her car was STOPPED. as i was backing, ok... about 3 sec before it happened, i wasn't looking at the back, coz i had to check the car at the side, but right before it happened, i saw her reversing, and i stopped my car. and obviously she didn't see me at all!!!! ARGH~~~~

ANd this all happened before seeing mum and dad first time for a month.. nice welcome home msg huh~ sry, there's a big dent on our car. -___- this is stupid.... a) it woudln't have happened if emily didn't come to uni. b) it wouln't have happened if emily didn't decide to wag c) it woudlnt 'have happened if she insisted that i drive home d) it woudlnt' have happened if we got to pak early, and she decided to eat. *sigh* ok... i know it's the past... but i am really relaly really angry

Ok... we had no witness... if it happened at any other part of auckland, ppl woudl prob be nice enough to come to be witness.. but not Meadowlands, coz asians hate troubles. So we went to insurance company and said that there's no way of determining who's fault unless if there's a witness... so if we get insurance company to cover.. for me that means $1000 excess fee plus i dont' know how much annual premium fee.... Ok... so if we fix it ourselves... the most basic cost is around $300, but that would mean our car would never look as nice again... *cries*

Came home today, and dad told me to give the other driver a call. Basically, if we dont' make her 'own up' that it's her fault... there's minimal things we can do to get our part of justice... and well... SHE DENIED!! and she just went, let's sort this out with the insurance company, i dont' care paying a bit more. WTF!!!! btw~~ she drives a Benz... we ended up with a huge dent, and her care looked perfectly fine, tho she did said certain plastic thing broke. WELL WHAT DO SHE EXPECT, Y DIDN'T SHE CHECK HER BACK MIRROR!!!!

So i dotn' knwo what's going to happen now... i think dad want to go through the insurance, try to argue some sense into them..... but the chances are... bleak... very bleak. *sigh* ok... $300 is affordable for me.... but IT JUST AIN'T FAIR!!! ~~ yea.. well life isn't fair.

*breath in*
*breath out*
......calm........


ok.. it's alsmot 1... i think i should go off now... i have more to say about other matters, but that'll have to wait. ^^

RaNdOm ThOuGhT oF tHe DaY
Everyone is weird in their own way, how we determine the weirdness of a person depends on how socially acceptable their weirdness is.

HaPpY MoOn FeStIvAl EvErYoNe~~~

So tired today, yup, payign a price of sleeping too late last night. Think i went to bed at like 12:30am, and woke up at 6:00am.... wow~ that's like 5:30 hours. no wonder i am tired, plus have panda eyes... hehehehe. Ooo was watching part of this programme on tv called 'stupidity' lol, it's really interesting. (only saw the end tho) THink it's highly related to socrates philosophy, that ppl r 'stupid' in the way that we denies the fact that we know something.. Yup i am stupid too, sometimes i pretend that i know things when i dont' actually know. OK~~ I AM STUPID, BUT THEN SO R U :P (no offence or anything) Oh~~ in the programme they talked about denying denials... which is when you deny something, and then you try to quickly forget that you denied it, denying ur denials... hahaha. Yea... we are stupid as a species.

Ooo this morning while i was 'sleeping' in info commons lv3 on the sofas, where i randomly looked down on to where recreation centre is every now and then. And i saw Mike walked passed, smiling... lol.. yea.. ok honestly, not many ppl actually walk with a smile, but he does. Dont' know how he does it. lol

Ok, i am at info commons again, (lv 3 again, surprisingly) and i was so lucky, i came here and saw at least 15 ppl waiting for computers, and i waited in one of the rows, and the girl infront of me just happen to get off the computer at that time. LUCKY ME ^^ the guy that's waiting for the computer look rather mad... oh well~~ bad luck for him =P Anyway, shoudl do notes, ttyl ^^

Mum is back today~~~

Hey ppl~~ i put up a background music for this site. check it out. I didn't put it on autoplay, so you'll have to press play yourself. But tell me if you guys like it ok... hehehe, i absolutely adore that song, it's prelude from ffx-2. hehehe for ppl who like that song and want it, let me know.. i have a mp3 file of it which sounds way better than this midi file. ^^

Parents back tomorrow, hehehe can't wait to get my new mp3 player and new battery for my fone!!! (which btw will definately die sometime during uni tomorrow) oh yeah~~ and of course i miss then too, so it'll be nice to see them tomorrow... and grandma too of course. ^^


i must add this quiz wasnt' very well made.. hehehe but given the choice of rikku, yuna and paine, i guess i am in between yuna and paine. *shrug*

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Ok... i did somethign bad tonight... i wont' say it in any details. But i feel disappointed at myself, even though i knew it was wrong, i knew it was mean. When given the offer, i still did it, becuase i didn't want to ruin my friend's chance to have some fun, or even to strain my friendship with this person, but at the expense of another friend's was just wrong. Why am i so weak towards things like that. i really need to learn to say no, and stand up to what i think is right. Everyone have their vulnerabilty, playing with them is more than wrong.~ Ok~~ for the person that i might have hurt tonight, i am more than sorry....

Random comment: for ppl hunting for ppl's weakness... i must be an easy target... lol... can get it all over this site =P

Lenlen had surgery to get her 2 wisdom teeth removed. hope she's ok. And hope she'll be able to eat properly soon. ^^

Talked to dad today, and he jsut went on and on about how i shoudl be more responsible and take care of the house better (i told him i didn't do anything with our garden since they are gone), oh~~ and he complained that i shoudl have sit infront of my computer for hours to figure out how to get my computer connected online, instead of just using his...... what the heck!!! i happen to have a life called~~ uni life..... -____- stupid mum, just had to go to sleep and hand over the fone to dad....... oh well`~ they'll be back on mon with lots of goodies, so i shoudl be happy, and shoudl definately start tidyign up the house. =D

EEek, feel so pathetic, just came out of bio106, today's topic is Haemophilia or something. Ok.. it's the disease that causes constant internal bleeding. After a few slides of gross pic, i got gross out and had to come out of the class to..er.. you know~ yuck now i taste like acid. Feel really pathetic, out of 400 students, i was the only one that had to come out. Oh well~~very glad that i didn't do humanbio142 now. (with the whole disection with rats and stuff) NOw does ppl know y i coudlnt' do med? or any med related stuff? It's funny, i only have a thing with blood. Last time i got grossed out was at physic (but that tiem it wasn't that bad) and that lecture was on heart, the size of the blood vessels and stuff. Ok~~ still feel stupid. I even got to sit with Anne today, haven't seen her for ages, and had to run out like that =S What the heck, think i shoudl go and buy some food now coz i am sure my stomach is empty... lol FOOD ^^

Just finished making one freaky phone call which i procrastinated 4 days for. =P It's for work, this' kids is really struggling during class, and Glenda and I were talking about what we shodul do with him, i mean in a class of 7, you really can't afford to stop for one kid. We were going to tell his parents that during class, one of us shoudl take him outside and have individual support. But last week, Glenda found out that this kid has 2 older sisters who were like 10 years older than him. Being the youngest child, growing up with 3 mums (sort of) he must be over protected. And apparently at 6, u stop being cute, and she thinks that he is still having troulbe standing on his 2 feet. (btw~ isn't Glenda so experienced? i would never figure all these out just from the fact that he has 2 very old sisters) So anyway, we decided to tell his parents flash card tests which would definately help his progress. And of course i have to make the call coz his mum doesn't know english, and they came from taiwan... yup just my luck.

My hands were still shaking after the fone call. FAct: most ppl dont' know that i have slight phone phobia, not to my friends, or close family members (obviously) , but everyone else. I get nervous before calling the pizza place, oh~ i even get nervous calling back to my tw home, lol... yea i am weird~ =P

The fone call....... was ok i guess, think i spoke a bit fast, and since i had to speak in chinese, it must've sounded really funny :P But she seem really really nice tho ( i am sure i must've soudned like an amatuer, wait a minute, i am one) lol.... either way, i dotn' care, it's done. ^^

wagged phil and physic today =P coz...... well ok... at 7:30 my alram clock sounded...... looked at emily, decided to wag physic. Went back to sleep..... at 9:30, gettign restless (been in bed for too long) Emily yelled at me for making too much movement. So angrily i stormed out. (ok i wasnt' angry, just pretended that i was, but i was kind of glad, gave me a really good excuse to get up), had breakfast, and as i was standing in my room some time after, i saw how windy today was. and right there and then, i decided to wag phil :D but of course eventually wne to uni at 1 coz i had lab at 2. got a ride tho, so it's all good. ^^

College ppl on holiday, it's so funny when i went to the toilet at macdonalds yesterday, there were 2 college ppl standing, one was in the cubicle, and she told her friend to open the tap for her. Lol remember how we used to do that when we were little??? :P heheh we matured ^^ yup, no longer ashamed of going to toilet. hahaha

Oooooo Big big big thank you to everyone yesterday. You guys are soooooo sweet. ^^ now i actually felt a bit guilty, coz it wasn't that big a deal, must've exaggerated a bit. But thank you guys so much.... *hugs*. Really, it meant a lot to me. Can't thank you guys enough. Love you all~~

Thank you ppl~~ you guys are so nice to me, i feel so loved. Love you guys ^^. Yes i feel so much better today. Went to 8am class again today, except instead of taking the normal 52, i took the express (which leaves bbeach later, but it stops at britomart, which means i have to walk up) amazingly, it got to britomart at about 7:35, which means i had heaps of time to walk up slowly. So i treat myself to starbucks coffee, had my usual caramel machiato, tho i swear there were no coffee in that :P tasted like carmel plus milk and water. Oh well~ taste nice nevertheless so who cares. You know walking up to uni in the morning is actually a good thing, i was a lot more awake for the class. I actually listened to about 60% of the lecture (as oppose to the normal 30%). Also prob coz i was sitting next to Sherry, (she makes me listne) hehehe.

Had that cool guy for physic again, he reminds me so much of mr. roddy, but a lot cooler. He does so many scary things to himself tho, hahaha, any accidents during any of his demonstration prob would have killed him.

Decide to go CD shopping today (yup, i saw the $10 CD ad from sounds) went to both of the sounds on queen street, coudlnt' find anything nice. So instead went to Borders to see if i could find 'a beautiful mind' To my disappointment i didn't, but omg~ they had really nice thing for you to listen to particular cds. heheh spent almost 40mins just standing there listening to random tracks. And end up going back to sounds to buy Corrs, the borrow heaven (it's like $4 cheaper at sounds).

Went to chem for about 2 mins and decide to wag, i thought it was going to be a new guy (which means new handouts) but it was still the boring guy, so i just left. hehehe On my way to britomart, saw tina (funny how everytime i wag, i always get caught) oh well~ Made it to the bus just in time. hehehe Oooo and just talked to mum and grandma and aunty online. ^^ hehehe it's all good.

For ppl who's going to the Yellowcard concert, have fun ^^

Oooo here's a quote Mike writtien on Jeff's tagboard which i thought it's really nice to share ^^ (hope he wont' mind me posting this up)

"Mutual respect is a prerequisite of equal friendships. The appreciation of self existence is purely based on self perception. "

Yes... self existence is based on self perception, that is soooooo true. You know, what suprises me most about uni is in some areas, ppl's maturity suppose to be a lot better. But what i found this year is there's so many judgement based on appearances. This puzzled me greatly, i thought the older we get, we are suppose to care more about what's on the inside, not what's on the outside~ this is one mystery i am still hoping to find out. ^^

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I am who i am, you don't have to like it, but dont' steroetype me, don't judge me until you know me. I know i am not perfect, i know i have flaws, but I try hard to be a better person. Yes I am not your typical girl. I don’t stand in front of mirror everyday for half an hour to try and look good. I don’t spent hours each week putting on makeup. To be honest, I don’t really care about image that much. I don’t like parties, I don’t drink, I don’t’ smoke, I don’t do drugs but I am seriously addicted to sugar(which I am trying very hard to cut down). I seldom listen to radio, I like nice orchestral soundtracks (yes I know… I am a geek, so what?!) I prefer to be in a small group of close friends over large group of so called friends. I am overprotective of myself, which means sometimes it’s hard for me to make new friends. (have to climb over the walls I built first), but sometimes it just means I cherish all my friends more,(even tho sometimes it means to step back, allowing them freedom to find their own new friends.) Saying no is a lesson I have yet to learn. (That’s how I get into the whole teaching mess) Also how I end up paying over $70 on sponsored child every month. (the 2nd one anyway), even though I think it’s wrong that they make all these children to be Christians, they should have the right to make up their own decisions. I am not religious, even though I am heavily influence by Buddhism (coz of family) I have no objection to any religion as long as it aims to educate ppl to be better ppl. I do however believe in equality, just becoz I don’t’ believe in certain god or gods am I less of a person.

I am who I am, and I have many flaws that make me insecure. I exist because I am; it’s been 4 years since I started using my nickname. (For ppl who has my website(other one) will prob know the story behind ‘vivi’) and still, I hope one day, I can overcome my insecurities, and help the world to be a better place I am who I am, if you don’t like it, then BYE~~ it was nice knowing you. ^^
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Was in a really really depressed mood this morning. Prob coz of last night, woke up this morning, still depressed about the same thing, prob coz i decided to go to morning bio at 8 today. AFter bio, (the time i normlaly use to write bio notes) i was just sitting at lv4 info commons, drinking coffee, thinking... making myself feel worst. I dont' know... and then my inner demons came back to haunt me again. Hey~~ haven't talked about demons of the day for ages... well... i dont' know about you ppl, but i have a huge inner demon (which i mite be brave enough to write it down one day... who knows). I am so sick of having to fight the same insecurities over and over again... again, wish mum's here.

Wish i didn't have to be home alone tonight, but i guess even if emily's home, it prob won't make that much of a difference. (she is prob sick of me telling her the same stuff over and over again) *sigh* i guess i know what i have to do........ fight back. Yes i'll be strong... well i will try......

Went to movies with Tina and Chin Lee (i think that's how his name is spelt) was goign to watch yugioh, but we were a big late for that, so ended up watching princess diaries 2. the movie was ok, very typical of disney movie..... But i have to say hanging out with Tina did made me feel better. ^^ thanks tina~~ wish i coudl be like her... happy everyday ^^

Feeling depressed and i dotn' know why, well~~ ok i do know why, but i wont' say..... hate being a girl... hate being me...... y do i always commit so much into somethign that probabily doesn't matter to everyone else... and then get disappointed, and thinking about it, it' really nothing. ......... wish mum is here.... she is good at analysing my mind for me...... *sniff* oh well~~ i'll be strong.

Just saw Iron Chef America. now i am hungry =P OMG~~ that jap chef made noodles out of lobsters.... wow~~ want to try it.... heheh oh well

Anyway, remember i used to religiously watch this show called "good eats" with Alton Brown coz it was very food sci related. And about a month ago, the show was replaced by 'bargain hunt' in living channel. hehehe now i know what happened to the host of that show. Heheh he was kind of the host of iron chef america. He said he was the 'professor' of cooking or something. but OMG!! he is so good!! he can look at the most bizarre ingredient, tell you what it is, where in the world it is commonly found, and how it is normally prepared etc etc.... oh my goodess!!! wish i coudl be like that one day... and note he didn't even do food sci courses, i think he graduated as a director or photographer of some sort.... hehehe *inspired* ^^

Ooo parents came back from Thailand, when i say back, as in back to tw, they wont' be back to nz for another 2 weeks. Hehehe mum sounds like she had fun, rode on elephants and stuff. Apparently dad was sad spending all that money on the holiday...... lol

Emily's make-up course cat-walk thingy today. Hehehe tina looked very pretty in pink ^^ heheh

Anyway, was passing notes with steven at physics. For ppl who don't know yet, STEVEN GOT A GF ^^ yeah~~ i can finally say it, after being forced not to...... heheh STEVEN GOT A GF..... rite...... anyway we were talking about relationship stuff. Ok... here's a question for you ppl, mainly for girls...

Ok... if a guy you liked as you "if i asked you out, would you go out with you" as oppose to "will you go out with me?" what woudl be your answers respectively? For me, i will never give a straight 'yes' for question, i reckon that's an evil way of guys to ask girls out. As if he is asking her to lay down her cards, without laying down his (if that made any sense at all).

I wonder if Steven knew this last year... what woudl've happen to him and sherry?? Hm.............. ok i really shodulnt' gossip on my blog.. (stop here right now!!!)

Yeah~~ tina looks relaly pretty today. ^^ hehehe, Ooooooo there was this guy (one of the model) he was like 1.9m tall, had long hair, and Jamie (the make up artiest) drew him into a vampire.. he even had scary eye contact on one eye...... OMG!!! he looks so freaky... but cool... lol... he actually reminds me of van helsing. hehehe

Anyway... work tomorrow, then TC tea party (which i am going to be late for) and going out to dinner with parent's friends @____@ note my parents aren't here..... argh~~ not going to be fun....... oh well~

Ooooooooooo first Jeff and now Mindy, everyone is getting a blog~~ yeah~~ ^__^ i am proud to say, i am the first one =D (from the study tour group anyway)

Finished!! finished!!! yeah~~~ finished phil test... which is the last one for few weeks ^__________^ yeah~~~ ok... happy, coz well, i think i did well. ^^ the translation part (the part i hated the most) was relaly easy, so yeah~~ ^_________^

Oh~~ yeah~~ it's a small small world. Ok... Kenny (the guy in my phil class), his dad was the conductor of the formosa string orchestra (or something along that line) and he was a violinist in it too. ANd Willam, Dan and Bruce were also in the orchestra... i mean... that is one random person that linked up to 2 different groups of my friends.... RANDOM!!! oh yeah~~ and we just both found out today that we came from Taiwan -_____- i thought he was from hong kong (since that's where cleon is from) until today when cleon start talking in cantonese, and he had a blank face (like me) lol.....

Anyway, when i was reading Jeff's blog today, somethign hit me..... what am i doing with my life??? ok.... let's look at everyone else's, Len is going to be a lawyer to defend the innocent, Tina is going to be a pharmacist to save ppl's lives, Jeff is going to be a doctor to again save lives, Mike is currently doing reserach on diabetes, again saving lives.... and what am i goign to do... with food???? @___@

Ok.... 2 areas food scientist can go into.... production and quality control
production - ok... i recently read a book called 'fatland' and well, food scientists in the 70s and 80s invented a high sucrose sugar from corn (somethign along that line) which was cheaper than can sugar and can increase shelf life. and what did they find out 5 years later? that not only that was high i calories, sucrose also can skip steps in metabolic pathway and is bad for ur liver. (think i mite have mentioned this in earlier entries) Anyway, the point is... i woudl love to go to the production line, i think it'll be a good challenge for me (since well, creativity isn't excatly my forte) and it seems more fun..... but i dotn' wnat to do something that my endanger many ppl's health.

Right.. so quality control. that means spending entire life in labs... which isn't too bad...... but then apparently nz food quality control just announced that it's ok to have 1 rat in a packet of potato chips -_________-

Maybe that's y dad keep telling me to do med or biomed. Well, to be honest, i never really looked at med as a choice, coz i know i am not hard out enough to get the grades i needed. And really, i do not want to spend 6 years in uni. (no offence to all you med ppl) and well... biomed... i considered it before, but decided that 1) to get a decent job in the field, you need to have post grads etc, and again, dotn' want to spend too much time in uni 2) the biomed industry in nz is quite small, and i dotn' really want to go overseas

still, it would be nice to save ppll's lives while working eh~~ but then again, i think it'll be scary...... Looking at our family history, i'll likely die of cancer, and i dont' want to know about it until i have to..... *shrug*

ok i am just typing to get out of doing my prelab... it's 10:09, i think i shoudl start prelabing now ^^

ok... me again, sitting at info commons. Ok... this is stupid. I came up here after bio, waited i dont' know how long to get on a computer, and when i finally get on one, i realize that of course they haven't post bio notes on cecil yet.... (stupid me) and now i am just wasting my time coz, well i dont' want to give up the computer i finally got. (yes... selfish.... i know) well i am in a bloggin mood, so TOO BAD.

Hehehe, everyone around me are stressing coz humanbio test on Wednesday. I feel bad, i have a test on Wednesday too, but i haven't started studying. I AM SO SCREWED FOR PHIL!! oh well~ what the heck, it's only an elective. Oh yeah~~ it's so funny, bus home yesterday took 2 hrs, and bus to uni was like... an hour, normally if i take 6:30 bus, i'll get to uni around 7:50 -ish, but today, we got here at 7:30 ^^ yeah~~ so early, didn't have much to do at all. Oooo saw Nancy on the bus which is a plus.

Oh yeah, talk to peter yesterday before his stats test. He was soooooo depressed, dont' know why, but i guess all of us have times when we feel alone, and that no one else cares about us. So here's my msg to everyone. I CARE!!! so ever feel lonely and want someone to talk to, remember i'll be here for you guys ok ^^ and u guys better be there for me too =P (yup u better)

Speaking of which, havent been to the knife shop for soooo long, wonder if those nice long swords are still there. One day, i'll take one home for sure. ^^ (don't know when that'll be)

Hehehe, ppl walking around me waiting for com... yup definatley feeling guilty.

Ooooooooo i actually woke up at 6 today, i am so proud. ^____^ coz last night , emily and i were like talking and talking and tlaking and talking in bed (coz it was quite earlish) and i thought i was never goign to sleep and won't be able to wake up. BUT I ACTUALLY DID!!! so proud, and i was at the bus stop sooooooooo early, that i had to stand in the cold for like 10 mins (yea... my fault) but it was a nice morning tho, the sky is 'almost' clear. Funny how things change. I remember back in college, i used to hate it when in the morning it's all high pressure, and the weather is always good. (coz then i have to walk instead of getting a ride) but now~~ it's like... yeah~ it's not raining, so i dotn' have to wait for the bus in the rain)

My goodness i am so good at blahhing~~

btw Hsuan wearing Nazi uniform to the ball??? that could be interesting, must remember to get photos. BTW~~ just to advertise, heheh when Hsuan comes back to NZ (prob early next year) emily is going to give him a make over, i.e. we are goign to dress him up as a girl =D hehehe that'll be interesting.

So cold today, thought it's spring and it's suppose to be warm.. oh well~~ Oooooo 9:43am shoudl go to class soon..... but i still have room to ramble :D

er..... want a new job...... no job for me. I really want a lab job, but it's so hard.. i mean who relaly want to hire an undergraduate for jobs like that... oh well~~ shoudl try that place where mum's friend's daughter works... i heard the pay is good ^_____^ (but then again, i have absolutely no complaints about my pays now~~~, did you know that if i stayed next year, i'll be getting $18 an hour??? why the heck am i leaving)

Speaking of work..... i am soooooo gonna miss my workmates, especially ALEX :'( oh~~ and the assistants, (even tho i yell, and bosses them around all year) ha....
Ooo tina just came and say hi~~ oh feel so loved ^^
ok... i shoudl go to class too

Have fun everyone, and dont' be stupid and waste time like me. ^^

YEAH~~ Jeff got is first blog ^^ yeah~~~ ok... if i get his permission, i'll post this up so ppl can read it. ^^

Anyway, heheh it't been a good 2 days, well i have my ups and downs.
Yesterday i woke up feelign not well (prob coz of vaccine) took a morning nap, and went to the study tour gathering. Heheheh had the best times. It's so funny, there are just ppl that you havne't seen for like... ages, but as soon as u start talkign to them, it's like u just talked to them yesterday or something... I dont' know... heheh, Anyway, i had fun yesterday.. Thanks jimmy for organising (even tho i am sure i wont' see this msg). oh~~ and love you guys, hehehe, hope we have more gatherings in the future (even tho the odds doesn't look very good)

So today........ first day back, saw len in the bus this morning, that just totally made my day. hehehe physic was.. well boring, OH YEAH~~ got a new lecturer in philosophy, lol, before he start speaking i thought he was a she (hahha me and my bad eyesight) but he has this long long hair..... lol. anyway he is very funny and cool. Kind of reminds me of howard, hsuan think the weirdness come from passion, i guess he is right. ^^ but i got so annoyed at the ppl sitting behind me tho, keep laughing at his accents -_____- come on~~ for once in phil, i wasn't falling asleep (tho i must admit by the end of the class my note looks.. well.. very docorated) :P

Oh yeah.... another rare event, i saw kenny like 3 times today (i think that's his name. btw kenny is htis random guy i met at phil (cleon's friend i think) THREE TIMES.... randomly......... funny, oh well~ he seems stressed about the test... EEEKKK i shoudl start studying for that

My fone ran out of battery today, and when i opened it tonite... heheh i got lots of msgs (another rare event) oh~~ i feel so loved (cough cough) whatever. ^^
ok.. i am hyper
but i shoudl sleep
better go to 8am class tomorrow so i can go to grocery shopping

BTW!! The stupid bus took 2HOURS to get hoem today @___@ stupid traffic got annoyed, but nevertheless had a nap on the bus....

Oh yeah~~ saw Mike today when the bus was passing new market this morning, he sure is going to uni late ;)

anyway... enough blah~~ hope i see anne tomorrow so i can give her her birthday present that's 2 weeks overdue... ooops

nite nite ppl ^^

I SUCK AT ADVERTISING, :S after i don't know how many anoucement, text msging, phone calling, no one, and i mean no one whom i have informed about alex's concert came. :'( Either i am a terrible advertiser, or ppl these days just have no interest in music..... oh well`~~ To all of you who MISS OUT!, Alex played extremely well, and professionally too i might add. It was a extrordinary good programme, and TOO BAD YOU PPL MISS OUT!!!! =P

Anyway, at work, had to teach the keyboard class today. Everytime i teach, i get a little depressed. I mean, ok, i try hard, i really do, it's like i leave friday night free every week just so that i can plan my lessons and stuff, but i just dont' know how to keep the kids interested.... oh stuff it, hope i am improving :S I also had to take choir today (normally i just accompanies) coz the teacher Jen just had a minor asthma attack. I got the kids into 3 groups, and they had to practice a song to perform at the end of the class. hahahah ok, really they sounded dreadful when they performed, but i guess it's a good experience for them, learning to work in a group situation, and come up with actions and stuff. Personally i am quite proud of how i took the choir today, even tho i am sure the cello teacher next door must've been pretty mad. (they made heaps of noise while practicing) =P

Anyway, tired, and my stupid arm still hurts from that stupid vaccine, oh well~ according to Alex, it'll last for about 2 days, so tomorrow, i'll be fine ^^

Randomly saw the dateHEY today is sept 11th,
Randomly remembers parents going to Thailand tomorrow, lol, hope they have fun. ^^

Alexandra Chan is having her First Bassoon Recital Tomorrow at 2:34pm at Howick Intermediate ( a room beneath the library) Please come and support, she is GOOD, like REALLY GOOD i promise.!!!

Please PLease Please come if you can, Alex is like a sister to me, very very important person to me, so i want some audience at her first recital. The location is a classroom size room, so it doesn't take many ppl, but support woudl be nice. ^^ note she is practicing for her diploma degree so she is GOOD!!!!
If you want more info, find me online, or call me 5359766 or 0212952659

COME!!!!?Even if i have to bribe you guys!!

Hehehehe, went to video ezy to rent 2 movies out today... 50 first dates and butterfly effect. so here's my movie review ^^

Butterfly effect: ok... if you have seen the trailer, and think it's incredibly cool, well it is cool, but it's a lot more freakier than i ever expected. A lot of violence and killing involved. Oh~ and the 1st hour, is really.. really...... freaky and boring.. but once you pass that (when he start travelling back in time) it's all cool. So basically this guy inherited an abnormal 'brain', in the sense that he 'black out' in many moments in his life, he can't remember what happened. Few years later, in college, he re-read his journals, and he can not only remember what happened in those blacked out moments, he can go back and altered it. And so he started altering his past to 'save' the ppl around him. But everytime he changed something for the good, somethign else goes wrong etc... and i wont' spoil the ending, but it's sweet but sad... bittersweet. but i guess it's the best ending ^^

50 first dates: first of all, since the girl in the story is called lucy, it's kind of weird hearing ppl talk about your name... lol.... i know it's not the first time, but i never get used to that. ANYWAY~~ it's romance comedy so obviously it's sweet. Kind of make ppl wonder what's it's like tho, waking up not remembering a huge chunk of your life. *shrug* anywya, not a big review coz.. romance comedy just about covers it all :P

Anyway, got a call from uncle Dean (family friend) telling us to get online coz mum and dad are at their friend's house, so they can talk to us through their internet... That was back at 5 pm, now it's almost 10pm, and no signs of them ringing anywhere, oh well~~ hope they fix their computer soon. ^^

Mum only gone for 2 days... and i think emily and i already had 4 or 5 cases where one blows up on another. But straight after, one of us will try to break the ice so the speak... We shoudl be gettign used to living on our own. I remember the first time, we were so nice to each other, because well, i guess no one wants to live in a house under pressure, and since it's just us... there's no one to sort things out. it's kind of funny, everytime they comes back, we'll have a big fight on nothing... just coz now we can wind down...... *shrug* oh well....... i'll try to be nice tomorow.

By the way, do you ppl think i am like a closed book? as in i dont' really share feelings with my friends??? emily told me that yesterday, in many ways i think she is right..... eeeeeeeeeek......... have to think......

Hihi ppl, just camp back from camp ^^ i want to write this entry while i am still in the mood. This is my account of the TC camp 2004, it's going to be a long entry so... hope you enjoy reading =D

Friday 3rd Sept
Angel and I got dropped off by mum at around 10:50am just before the meeting time of 11. As we entered, we were given a set of uniforms, shoe bag, name tag and various of other things, but wait, no one told us anythign about uniforms??? we have to wear uniforms??? and note, they are not the most nicely designed clothes, a grey shirt (which is huge for all the girls) and white pants (which if you didn't bring your own, u'll be given one of those high waist ones... the ones that no one have seen since 1990s). At the entrance was also the first time i met my team leader Kathy, I'll say more about her later on.

So we went to our dorm room (which is a large-ish room with 2 walls of windows and 2 walls of mirrors) and we all got changed into our uniform. (honestly... i did not like the uniforms AT ALL!!!! makes me feel like i am a prisoner... oh well~) We then settled down into the study room, oh~ and i just describe about the location which we stay in. It's TC's main building in Auckland, which is brand brand new. infact they just finished furnishing it the day before we arrive. It's really clean and nice... and to think all the ppl volunteeringly cleaned, painted etc to make the place look absolutely perfect just for us... it's really something huh~ We set there while ppl one by one arrives, we introduced each other while we waited. There were 19 of us as members and 12 committees and a lot of very devoted adults (regretably blog is incompatible with chinese, so i can't mention them by their proper title)

Lunch was first up, and of course everything is vegetarian food, very nice vegetarian food i might add, those adults are really good at cooking. yum yum~~ (forget about my diet... start tonite... eeek) After the meal, we had a serious of lessons, about the foundation of Tzu Chi, and the foundation of Tzu Chi youth (this is the really simplified version of the name), and some of the manner that we shoudl follow according to TC (which is a Buddhist organisation) but they were very tolerant in the way that they taught us what to do when we entry the 'temple room'(the room with a statue of a Buddha) but they also said that if it conflict with your belief or religion,you dont' have to do that. TC is a charity organisation, not a religious one. That's one of the thing i really like about TC, it doesn't matter who you are, what are your beliefs etc, as long as you have a heart to help others, they'll welcome you with open arms.

Ok... there's so much to write, and i've written a lot of rubbish already so i am going to simplify a lot. We learnt about sign language, had dinner, start organising our performance for Saturday night and slept... Btw, we all slept on the floor with nice big blanket which was apparently donated by Brisco :P

Saturday 4th Sept
We woke up at around 6:30am by MY alarm clock :P hehehe, because i had to work(i actually felt a bit bad not taking a leave, but i really didn't want to, coz at the end of the year i have to take 5 weeks off, and i feel guilty about that already) I got change into my own clothes... yeah~~ no uniform ^^ and waited for my mum and went to work... the details of work i wont' mention, except to say i had to shout really loud to keep the kids quiet, almost lost my voice =S

When i went back, they were just finishing making nice pretty flowers(one thing that i really wished i hadn't missed) After that we had a few games that tested our puzzle solving skills, and i am proud to say our group was the only group that solved one of the puzzles all thanks to our intelligent Aaron ^^ . That night we had a performance night sort of, every group performed their item. Ours was the re-scripted "little red ridding hood", oh yea... we had to perform a skit on based on our group name, which is "peaceful" (note it's translated so doesn't sound as flash) so i was the angry mum who throw little red ridding hood out of the house, so she ran to grandma's house, saw the grandma's friend a vegatarian wolf, and with a help of the hunter who we made into this ghostly charater, little red ridding hood made up with her mum, and yeah~~ happy ending. (btw... i screwed up my lines pretty bad during the night :P trust lucy to get stage fright =P). One thing i must add, the adults had WAY more fun than we did, they were soo HIGH :P hahaha, very suprising, i didn't actually expect you know... ppl like our parents to dance around and stuff.. lol

Afterwards we had a secret meeting, just us, the teenagers... ok only a few in late teens, most in their 20s. And we talked about random things... hahaha in another word i forgot. OOops... moving on.... we stayed up till really late (or early) to make a nice flower thing with little messages from all of the members for the committees for working so hard on this camp.

Sunday 5th September
Ok.... today is the day that is really really.... i don't know... made a mark in my memory i think.... we woke up at 7 ish.... breakfast at 8. Then the committees performed a very very touching story about a mother and his rebellious, and by the time he realized how much he has hurt his mother (through a letter) his mum passed away..... OMG~~~ it was so touching, almost cried.... by the time the story end, all the girls had like tissue boxes and stuff... lol, yup i am still the most cold-blooded girl around. ANyway, beside the point, the story really made a point about the endless devotion parents gives us, and that we shoudl appreciate what we have, and love ppl, show them that we care now. It reminds me the countless morning when i have to get on the 6:30 bus in the morning, even tho i thought mum that she can sleep in, she always wakes up at 6 to make lunch for me. And to think all this time that if someone grab me to lunch, i'll just guiltlessly chuck mum's lunch into the bin, completely unappreciated of her work.... =S mum i love you~~

After the play, we sit in a circle, and shared our thoughts on the play, one of the adults there, a mum, she cried so hard while talking. She has a son who is also rebelious, and to this day have not returned to her. To her, she feels like it's her fault for not teaching her child right, but she always remembers what the founder of TC says, that if your children are good to you, and listen to you, they are here to return a favour from your past life (remember Buddhism and reincarnation) but if your children are rebellious, you are here to return them a favour etc. I don't know... personally i think i have a great relationship with my mother, we love each other, and we both know that... so in a sense i can't really related to that mother's pain... but to hear someone say such thing from the bottom of her heart, it's really touching. Ok... i know for the readers i am just blahing~ so i am just going to say.... embrace what you have, we are luckier than many, appreciate the ppl around us, love them for whom them. To be honest, recently i have issues with certain beliefs that i have for a long time, that you know... if you are good person, nothing else really matters etc.... for a while i really think i was just being naive and stuff, but this trip reassured my belief. ok i will stop here, dont' want to get too personal. ^^

Ok... i won't comment on the rest of the camp, becoz after that we concluded the camp, tidied up had lunch and left. But I will say however this camp turned out so much better than i ever expected, it touched my heart in many different ways, and i think that's y i wanted to be part of TC again after so many years, because it's just a pleasure to be around ppl who give so endlessly, who love each other, and give so much to the needed and the community.

Eek i think i am sounding so cliche now, so i'll stop...soon, just a final note, i really want to thank my group leader Kathy, i know she probabily wont' read this. But She is ALWAYS so cheerful and happy. She made me realize something, that we shoudl try to be happy, give ppl a smile, you may just make the day for others while having fun yourself...

Last note: HAPPY 50TH BIRTHDAY TO MY WONDERFUL DAD, AND HOPE YOU HAVE AN ENJOYABLE FATHER'S DAY. I LOVE YOU DAD!

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii, Ok.... on a diet... don't know how long i can keep this, coz well, camp in 2 days, and i can't relaly control my diet that well on camp... oh well doesn't matter..... so far i lost 800g of water.... yup.... water -_____- first stage in dieting, lost of glucogen (which holds water), so losing glucogen supply means u lose the water... and water weights a lot. Anyway, i've been cooking all week, since i am on diet... i've cut down almost completely on carbohydrate, and our meal consist of salads and soup... lol......... mum's enjoying it (coz she love veges) and she lost more weight than i have -_________- not fair!! I shoudl excercise...... oh well~ :P

oh yea... too must fructose is not good for liver, and it contribute to diabetes, so just watch the amount of fructose intake ppl~ =O
Love you all ^^